I (23F) can not neglect what my bf (21) talked about in his sleep and it’s tearing us aside. : relationships


My bf and i’ve been collectively for a 12 months and a half. A few 12 months in the past, I used to be sleeping subsequent to my boyfriend in his mattress after I awoke to him sleep talking. He started by moaning the title of yet one more girl(23). A woman that we every know. Then he did it a second time. I used to be wakeful listening to him, in complete shock, my abdomen turning. Then he grabbed my hips (I used to be in small spoon place) thrusted his groin into my behind and talked about a phrase that nonetheless haunts me. “You make me need to cum *her title”. I woke him up and he was in shock, he genuinely freaked out- he bought up and left the house, just about cried, buried his head in his arms, bought so labored up that I needed to calm him down. We eventually fell again asleep – I awakened early primarily as a result of I used to be leaving for a visit. I woke him as much as say goodbye and acceptable simply earlier than I left (he was nonetheless groggy) he talked about “I get pleasure from you *her title” to my face together with his eyes open. My coronary heart was damaged however I found to maneuver earlier it. I accepted that it was only a foolish dream and on the worst it meant he had a crush on his pal.

Fast ahead to now, they function collectively as musicians (she requested for him to hitch her band) late nights, often him not coming again until three or 4 within the morning drunk or larger. They go on journeys collectively with the band, rapidly they’re arranging to go on tour in Europe. I’ve needed to develop so considerably as a particular person to not let jealousy devour me alive. I’ve nurtured a respect for the woman and I’ve certainly not been chilly or bitter to her, in actuality I actively seem as much as her and usually say whats up after I see her. I believed that elements had been finally fading away however then some factor occurred last night that has place my full connection into question.

My bf and I, the woman, and a few mutual shut mates had been at a bar ingesting, acquiring a good time, when my boyfriend unintentionally calls me the wrong title, her title. It wasn’t a significant deal, he apologized immediately nevertheless it stung. Later that night we ended up at a celebration and I used to be listening to some shut mates play the guitar when my bf walked open air. No biggie, he was most likely out for a cig. I’m going out to look for him and hes gone. Who else is gone with him? After all it’s her. Once I acknowledge that they’ve every left the celebration collectively I need to cry. I need to go property that second. I used to be in discomfort however I saved it collectively all by way of my shut mates asking me precisely the place they’d been. I might have gone strolling by means of the neighborhood to acquire them however I selected to not. Hopefully you guys could have an understanding of why. They end up getting gone for some factor like 30-45 minutes. He comes again, I hug the woman goodbye and we every depart the celebration.

I cannot go into element concerning the argument that ensued however I instructed him how upset that it produced me to acknowledge he was gone together with her. How I couldn’t neglect what he had talked about about her in his sleep, how I felt like he was hiding some factor from me that was popping out in his concious and unconscious speech. He instructed me that his habits was no distinct than approaches I’ve acted together with his shut mates. He instructed me that primarily as a result of I laughed when a male pal of ours tickled me that meant that I used to be interested in him (I’m not.) He instructed me that no a single understands him and that he was dissatisfied that I wasn’t the a single who left the celebration to go receive him. He instructed me that sure, he did like her “i had certainly not met everybody like her, similar to I had certainly not met a person such as you” We went to sleep subsequent to each single different however we had been worlds aside.

Reddit, I acknowledge that this discomfort will certainly not go away. As prolonged as they proceed to function collectively I’ll typically marvel, I’ll typically consider myself to her. I actually really feel at this level it is just a matter of time simply earlier than some factor happens amongst them. I’d certainly not ask him to stop his band or sever his connection together with her. However I dont know if I can stick by him, it’s so painful. He’s in full harm-manage mode, writing me poems, telling me he needs to restore this so badly. I’ve instructed him I need some house.

Am I overreacting? Is there some factor I can do? Actually ought to I scale back my losses and transfer on? I get pleasure from him so considerably, my coronary heart is hurting. Thanks for studying.

Tldr: my boyfriend admitted in his sleep that he’s interested in yet one more girl, they proceed to develop nearer, i actually really feel it is just a matter of time simply earlier than some factor happens amongst them, what do I do?


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