Sometimes, It Doesn’t Have to Make Sense!
So, here’s the problem: My head.
I think too much. I analyze. I try and figure everything out. I line up all my ducks. I make my pluses and minuses list. I go back and forth, back and forth, back and forth until I’m exhausted, and sometimes I even avoid making a decision and let the chips fall where they may, and consider that my decision. You see, things have to make sense to me. If they don’t make sense, if I don’t see how everything is going to work, I get “Yes” phobic.
In September, when I least expected it, certainly wasn’t looking for it, and didn’t want it, a dog came into my life….and let me just say for the record, I was NOT ready!!!! I did NOT want to be tied down!!! I did NOT want to lose my freedom!!! I did NOT want to take care of anyone else!!! I did NOT want to clean up poopie messes, go to the vet, find people to babysit, feel guilty when I have to leave him alone for the day, overnight with someone, or God forbid have to get coverage for an entire week if I travel.
I did NOT want to face decisions regarding vaccination, heart worm or worry about deer ticks. Did I mention that I was NOT ready??? Oh yeah, while we’re on the subject, I did NOT want to love something so much again, like my last dog Scruffy and have to watch him get old, sick and die. No, I did NOT want to re-live the pain of letting go of something I loved, all too soon.
So, there I was….with all my reasons why I wasn’t ready…which no one blamed me for…after all, all my reasons were reasonable; they made perfect sense. So then, why on God’s green earth did I say yes???? Why did I agree to go see that little ball of fluff in the first place? And why oh why, did I agree to take him home and care for him til death do us part?
It’s simple…my heart screwed up my plan. I picked him up, he melted in my arms, the rest is history. He was mine.
Seven months later, I can’t imagine my life without Max. When I think back to how sure I was about NOT being ready, all I can do is laugh and Thank God I let my heart open again, just in the nick of time.
Love is a risk, isn’t it? But let’s face it, the payoff is big! So can be the payoff for saying “Yes”, when all your “reasons” point to NO. Sometimes, it doesn’t have to make sense.
The truth is, the greatest things that have ever happened to me, happened only after I got out of my own way, when I said YES, even though I was scared to, and when I trusted in something bigger than all my reasons.
I have learned that every decision we make is made from either Faith or from Fear, and that it’s okay to be afraid, as long as I do it anyway…..
I wish you the many blessings that come, with decisions made from Faith!
To The Truth That Sets Us All Free,
Donna Gershman ALSP
PS. You can heal, and you don’t have to do it alone! If you or someone you know needs support in healing an issue, whether it be physical, emotional or spiritual, please feel free to email me at [email protected] or contact my office at (818)904-6840 for a free telephone consultation.