Justifying poor behavior in relationships does far more harm than great. When you justify poor behavior in your connection you are setting incredibly harmful patterns that will be really hard to break down the line. If it goes on for as well extended, it will turn out to be not possible to modify it.
Justifying poor behavior is genuinely just an excuse to not address substantial challenges in your connection due to the fact of worry. Yes, you could appreciate this particular person, and of course you ought to have a specific level of worry of losing them. That is healthful in every single connection and what assists persons preserve their poor behavior in verify. What is unhealthy is justifying mistreatment and toxicity when a person is afraid to speak up for themselves and cease the poor behavior.
A healthful, satisfied connection requires to have boundaries, and you can’t be afraid to enforce them otherwise they do not genuinely exist in your connection. That is like possessing a jail with no guards, and no locked doors. Folks use excuses such as “I am attempting to be the larger person”, when in reality, you are lowering your requirements.
If you are in an adult connection, you ought to behave like a adult, and fully grasp you are accountable for your poor behavior. So ought to your companion. So sufficient of that excuse. They know what they did was incorrect, even if they are attempting to defend it, and you need to have to cease enabling them a free of charge pass.
Why ought to you be afraid to drop your companion for calling them out for their poor behavior if you companion is not afraid to drop you by behaving badly? Can you not see that they know your worry, and that due to the fact of that, they think they can get away with acting a fool due to the fact you give them no consequences to their actions? The saying “What you permit will continue” is so correct in relationships. You can justify your fears as substantially as you want, but the truth is the truth. Does not your personal predicament prove that? How extended are you going to remain in a state of denial?
You want to justify it by saying to your self you are maintaining the connection collectively? Nicely, you are truly letting your companion harm your connection so the two of you are functioning collectively to destroy your connection. Is that what you genuinely want? By justifying poor behavior, at some point you will locate your connection will attain the breaking point. Neither of you are respecting your connection. You and your companion are not respecting YOU. A connection without having respect is a dysfunctional connection. Plain and uncomplicated.
If your worry is generating you behave badly, disrespecting your self by enabling your self to be mistreated, you need to have to make far more balance. You need to have to each be afraid that poor behavior can finish the connection, not just one particular of you. The only way to do that is to address the poor behavior in the connection alternatively of justifying it. And preserve in thoughts, poor behavior is solved far more so by actions, rather than words. Actions enforce boundaries far more so than empty words that have no actions backing them up.