Soft Heart, Thick Skin | Girls of Faith


There I was standing on the playground, underneath the monkey bars, 10 years old, two extended braids hanging down my back.  This image is burned into my brain as one particular of the extremely initial occasions my feelings had been actually hurt.

I was standing there with two other girls waiting to locate out which one particular of us would be selected to be the girlfriend of the new boy in college.  Needless to say, I wasn’t selected that day. I walked away feeling hurt and embarrassed. Twenty-eight years later I could appear back at that small girl and inform her it does not matter in the extended run, I could inform her that very same boy would be her initial kiss and after once more break her heart five years later. I could inform her she would meet the man of her dreams in just a handful of brief years and none of this would matter for her future. I could inform her all these factors, but it wouldn’t ease her discomfort.  

This was the moment that anything shifted in me, it was the starting of understanding how to deal with an offended heart.  

After I felt myself turn out to be offended and hurt it would have been uncomplicated to keep away from any other scenarios that could potentially hurt my feelings.  I could have selected to keep away from friendships or relationships exactly where I may practical experience discomfort. I on the other hand think that life is meant to be lived with men and women!  People had been so extremely essential to God that he chose to send Jesus to die for all of them.

If we want to reside a life exactly where we are not offended very easily by the extremely men and women God has placed in our lives to make us much better and stronger, we have two options.  Harden our heart or thicken our skin.

Psalms 55:12-14

It is not an enemy who taunts me— I could bear that.

It is not my foes who so arrogantly insult me—  I could have hidden from them. 13 Rather, it is you—my equal, my companion and close pal.

14 What great fellowship we after enjoyed as we walked collectively to the property of God.

David knew the discomfort of betrayal.  He knew the heartbreak of losing a pal.  Offenses can typically be unexpected, so we have to be ready to manage them, David provides us a great instance.  

Rather of maintaining his heart really hard toward men and women he identified his hope and healing in God.  Offenses will come (Luke 17:1), but when they do come we have to opt for how we are going to respond.


Right here are a handful of strategies we can opt for to reside unoffended

When we forgive very easily we retain our hearts absolutely free from offense and release other folks from the trap of offense.  We can give grace, even when we are correct and they are incorrect, even we have not received an apology. It does not hurt me to extend grace to a further.

  • Communicate your feelings

When we communicate our feelings we can start to hear what the other particular person is going via, we can have meaningful conversations and relationships can be strengthened via the conflict.

When we let Jesus be the center we understand it is not truly about us anyway.  Paul tells us in Galatians two:20, “it is not I who reside but Christ who lives in me” We are dead to our personal way of pondering and performing, we are now produced alive in Christ.  So our offenses pale in comparison to the mission of the gospel.

When we see our offense with a view of eternity, we start to understand how small it truly matters.  Offense keeps us from performing what God has referred to as us to do and that is precise trap of the enemy. If Satan can get us to concentrate on what is about us rather than who is above us, He wins.  

Bruised hearts heal, really hard hearts break.  God is concerned about our hurt and our discomfort, let us opt for to take the discomfort to him and let him heal us rather than holding onto it and letting it quit us from moving forward.

For the duration of the month of April I will be the featured Voice with Girls of Faith Ambassadors,  I would enjoy to encourage every single lady present to retain a soft heart even when it is really hard! We will concentrate on some of the places I’ve touched on in this weblog, as nicely as other folks as we take a appear at our personal hearts.  It is so essential to self assess so God can reveal truth and move us forward.

Click right here to turn out to be a Girls of Faith Ambassador now and engage with other girls who are just like you!



Carrie Erikson is the co-pastor of  Mercy City Church in Lincoln, Nebraska, alongside her husband Matt. They planted Mercy City in 2015 and have observed radical development in the church, launching a second place at the starting of 2018. Prior to moving to Lincoln, she lived in Macon, GA, and Rockford, IL, Carrie and Matt served as campus pastors and youth pastors for almost 14 years. Matt and Carrie have been married due to the fact 2001 and have 4 young children, Cooper (15), Elijah and Emery (13), and Lilah Jane (eight).

Carrie is a graduate of Liberty University with a Bachelor’s Degree in Christian Counseling.  She is a Voice with Girls of Faith and frequently teaches Girls of Faith Ambassadors.  She has been blogging due to the fact 2012 and is at the moment operating on her initial book.

Carrie’s heart is to see men and women locate hope in Christ, no matter what their circumstance or circumstance. It is her greatest hope that men and women can locate freedom in God’s faithfulness. She has traveled all more than the US and internationally in 7 other nations bringing a message of hope. It is actually her heart’s need to see every single knee bow and every single tongue confess that Jesus is Lord.

Understand a lot more about Carrie at


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